It's finally the middle of the month. Do you know where your monies are? I didn't think so. First and foremost, a special shout out to all our international visitors hanging out at the miked Pub Quiz website this month. Thanks for stopping by. Also, a very special "thank you" to whomever blew up the transformer (electrical, not toy-based) outside my house last night. Twice. It was loud, it was proud, and it scared the living hell right outta' me. Read after the jump for some great graphics...

Sooo.......you has some questions about a Pub Quiz, eh? Well here's the simple breakdown, in small words so you can understand it better.

Who: You and your friends if you still have any.

What: General knowledge pub quiz

When: First Wednesday of every month. Not every other month, every month.

Where: PJ McIntyres Irish Pub (www.pjmcintyres.com)

Why: Because it's a good excuse to get out of the house, get made fun of, and test your knowledge while taking a stab at earning some spending money! Plus, it's another excuse to consume adult beverages. As if you needed yet another excuse.

How:

• Signup is at 6:30pm - 7:30pm . The quiz will start sharply at 7:30pm.
• $5 per person, teams of 1-8 people
• PRIZES: 1st Place - 50% of the door, 2nd place - 25%, 3rd place - PJ's Gift Cards!

What does it cost?

$5 per person. Teams of 1 to 8 people.

How long does it take?

Usually around two hours or so.

So this is a "trivia night"?

Please take a moment to think about what you just asked and why everyone is staring at you right now. In short, no this is not just "trivia night." For starters, the quiz itself, takes from 10-14 hours to create, from scratch, each and every month. This is a completely audience-interactive event that will pit the most sarcastic know-it-alls against the folks that actually know something useful. From the random screaming out of answers, to my mom making fun of you for being stupid, this is a far cry from "trivia night." Video rounds, logic rounds, printed rounds, all sorts of crazy that makes it a multi-sensory experience. Over the years, I have learned that literally anything can and will happen.

Is the quiz difficult?

Yes and no. I try to vary the rounds and difficulty so the "smartest" teams won't necessecarily win. Obscure movies from the 1980s is generally going to be a different crowd than Superconductive Thermodynamic Mathmatics in Functioning Autonomous Systems crowd. The team with the widest array of knowledge usually comes out on top. Anything and everything. From bizarre factoids about strange movies, to sports, history, the arts, and everything in between. No category is off-limits.

Can I have the questions ahead of time?

No, you may not have the questions ahead of time. You are now at -4 points for asking that.

Can you PLEASE make the questions easier?

No, I will not make the questions easier. Your entire team is now negative 23 points. I hope you're happy.

Can we use our cool new cell phones that we paid too much for to look up answers?

No. That is not a test of your team's knowledge. That's a test of your team's ability to use a small screen and tiny buttons quickly. I circulate in the crowd and will deduct points if I see any cheating. And I don't care if you were "just txt'ing my mom." You're a liar. And now your mom knows it.

Additional questions not answered here? Email me!

Howdy-ho Pub Quiz geeks! Well holy hell did we have a great quiz this month! Lots of new face, lots of old, withered, angry faces. All things that make me smile at night knowing I'm not you. Super congrats goes to team Vlasic Pickle for bringing home first place! Long-time quizzers, Professor Vlasic said of their win, "Does this mean we get to sit up on the stage next month?" Indeed it does professor. Indeed it does.

Moreover, I believe the loudest and largest cheer came from the announcement of the 6th-place team......wait for it.....the world-renowned "Team 11"! Oh how far from grace we fall. When asked of their less-than-stellar performance, lead electric trianglist Thom said, "F*$% YOU! Just F$&#% YOU MIKED! GET OUT OF MY LIVING ROOM! I'M CALLING THE COPS YOU @#@#($#)#HOLE!" So that was nice. And uncomfortable.

So make sure you check out the"Fotos" section for some great shots. And keep your lookin' balls on this site as the month progresses. Don't forget to sign up for a free account on this website for access to the Secrest section (home of the Secret Question) and for a coupon for 2 FREE Bonus Points on the quiz of your choice! How exciting for you!

Greetings and salutations my internets friends. How has your month been thus far? Really? That’s amazing? Uh-huh……yeah…….oh how cool for you! No way! You are KIDDING ME! Really? Wow. Regis Philbin. Who knew! Good for you and your hunched over aunt that couldn’t reach that jar of green beans. Well, enough about you, let’s talk about me!

So there has been a lot of static about cheaters, the use of cell phones ("Oh, I was just texting my mom" or "Oh my boyfriend just called to say hi!") Yeah, well, I call BS on all of those. Perhaps legit. Perhaps not. In either case, whether cheating like the low-down dirty piece of ham fist you are, or perhaps just checking in with long-lost friends at a somewhat inopportune time, here is my official stance: YOU SUCK! No, seriously though. You really do. Cheating on a pub quiz? How could you? My mom is gonna' bring the beat down on your ass! So here is my summary of random thoughts on the topic in stunning numerical order (Please hold your applause. You're sitting at a computer, and that's just weird to be clapping at the screen.):

1. Use a cell phone during the "question" phase, I warn you. Answer phase or during a break, understandable. You can wait 5 minutes to txt "No, ur my schmoopsies" to your significant other.
2. Do it again, I start deducting points. I've done it before, and by jove, I'll do it again. Yeah, "by jove." I said it.
3. I could be more diligent about paying attention to "phonies." And so I shall. This doesn't mean I want a bucket of 3rd-grade tattletales, Leper Colony.
4. The amount of time it takes to look up ONE answer is usually enough time to ruin at least two others. However, that still doesn't make it tolerable.
5. I try to motor through the quiz quickly so there isn't the opportunity to find the right answer on the PortaInterwebs™ anyways. Perchance I shall go a little quicker in October. We'll see if the "slow" people in the crowd can keep up. If you can't, odds are you're cheating. Or actually "slow" in the clinical sense. Sorry about that.

I'd love to know your thoughts on this. After all, it's your quiz! Whaddya' think?

Hey there, hi there pub quizzers! I am slowly recouperating from this past pub quiz. I had a great time stumping you all multiple times. That was truly the highlight of my month! In other news, I put my (albeit weak) thinking cap on and came up with a a few tolerable options for the "clothing poll" I promised everyone. Below is a list of items I would be marginally willing to wear for the next quiz. You all have until the 26th of September to vote. Whichever item wins, is what I shall wear. Any additional suggestions can be emailed to me, and may get added as the month continues. Good luck, and I bet I will hate you all even more after this one.

POLLING IS NOW CLOSED. TO SEE WHAT FINALLY WON, SHOW UP AT THE QUIZ!