Greetings quiz-heads! I just thought I'd drop a line as a reminder that The miked Pub Quiz will be taking a break in August, but will return in force in September. I will be gallivanting around the beautiful countryside in Ireland for three weeks, and will certainly not at all miss you guys and gals. The incessant hate mail, the glaring sarcastic looks, the bountiful middle-finger-flipping and the profanity will have to wait. Please keep track of all your rude and inappropriate remarks, and save them up for September's quiz. And I hate all of you. Especially Karl. He's a jerk. Read more for his wonderful email to me...

Karl writes:

"Dear Assface,

Why is it that you are stupid? I have been to your "quizes" before, and I have to admit, that you are stupid. Your questions are dumb, your answers are dumb, and you are even dumber. Please tell me why you are dumb?"

Well, Karl, let me start by saying, thank you so much for taking the time to write to me. I sincerely appreciate it. In reference to your questions, I can only surmise an answer. I think that perhaps I am so stupid because it's fun, and easy. Being smart is far more difficult than I am capable of. Moreover, I promise to occasionally read a book or to find some questions that will be less dumb. Also, to clarify, I don't actually think "assface" is in the dictionary. Therefore, I can only assume you are lashing out because you had a rough upbringing. And finally, Karl, you are the greatest person on Earth. Your email put a giant smile on my face, and a hug flaming bag of dog poop on your front porch.

So keep those letters pouring in folks! I personally love them all! Except for that one about some property in Las Vegas for only pennies an acre. I'm still waiting for the deeds to my "4.7billion Acre Farmstead Allotment".

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Annoying Jim  - MR. to you buddy     |66.213.123.xxx |2009-07-01 16:25:37 Hey Miked, I think Karl is just mad because you are going on vacation and not taking all of us. It's not to late to invite us to go along with you. We can sing 99 bottles of beer in the backseat while you drive. When we get to Ireland, assuming the ocean is frozen all the way across, you can ask us some trivia questions. I bet Karl feels better already. When do we leave?

miked  - to whom it may concern   |SAdministrator |2009-07-02 01:02:12 Dear Diary, While I appreciate your enthusiasm for driving from somewhere local, say a defunct Bennigans in Elyria, all the way to Ireland, I hate to be the one to inform you of this: The ocean will most likely be COMPLETELY frozen over. And yet, all the gas stations are closed along the route. That being said, please move your car out of my driveway. You're scaring "Garage Space Monkey". No seriously, why the hell is your car in my driveway? Upside down? And on fire? HAPPY 4th!

uncle ken   |68.110.187.xxx |2009-07-09 06:29:43 daily factoid: my uncle ken is the meanest person on planet earth according to a recent survey of everyone ever! finally, a factoid that is true! except for the part about a recent survey of everyone ever. and the part about uncle ken being the meanest person on planet earth. so close.

mitzilla   |68.110.187.xxx |2009-07-09 20:41:56 I am witness to the fact that Uncle Ken is the meanest person on the planet because I've been living with him for almost 30 years so don't believe a word he says!

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