January 2012

Team Jelly Brains did their annual January Gift Exchange of Knitted Goods. It was amazing.
I wish I had something nice to say about this beautiful orange man boob. But I don't. It was a boob. On a man. And orange.
Who's that dapper chap in a fancy dress jacket? After the quiz, I went home and burned that jacket in Everclear. The booze, not the band.
Team Kilbane & Patton still don't know which one is the middle finger. And I don't have the heart to tell them.
The low-budget Kamms Corner's Witness Protection Program consists of a dirty napkin and a burb. So good luck.
This team once told me that if I gave them bonus points, I could have all the ice cream I wanted. And I never got any ice cream. IT WAS ALL A LIE!
I'm as shocked as you are.
All I know is my car was completely filled with this after the last quiz, and it was DELICIOUSNESS! Thanks vandals!
Yep! Tis true! We were just hired as models for the new Hollister catalog. Look for it soon!
Moments later, a herd of marshmallow peeps stormed the stage and took hostages. It was quite a show.
I had to explain to him that this wasn't THAT kind of club. He eventually figured it out after 215 dollars.
I don't know what was in the box, but I know they enjoyed sparring over it for more that 45 minutes.
I hired a team of painters to recreate the scene from the stage. But one of the painters only brought dark colors. And the other one only brought a lawsuit.

December 2011

I didn't want to be the one to tell them that ordering a beer for their invisible friend made them seem really really sad. But it does.
You can see the pure joy on his face as he scratches off another losing lottery ticket. Even Mickey Mouse is trying to escape the scene.
A face for radio.
I'll let you guess who is who on this team.
A couple of fancy-looking perms hanging out in the background! I was so excited, I cried a little.
Nothing says Christmas like a dirty tramp leg, and that lamp in the background.
I specifically asked that no one wear any mustard-colored jackets in observance of Christmas. And someone ignored my pleas.
wondering if his team would ever show up. Alas, it was a lonely night for that poor little napkin.
This team is particularly fond of questions from the 50s and 60s. So of course, I had to oblige.

November 2011

Makin' Bacon managed to score their usual 4th place finish. You'd think they would start sucking up to me to get some freebie bonus points! Maybe buy me some beers or some candy at intermission? Or supply bacon to the bar? ANYTHING!
Mom says hi. And she misses you. And wants to know why you didn't come over for tick-or-treating this year? What happened? Are you mad at mom? What did she do to you? What's wrong?
Had I actually been able to find myself a black Sharpie marker, I would have turned this delicious hunk of a man into a human jack-o-lantern. But alas, it did not come to pass.
The late, great roadway baron of the 1800s stopped by in ghost form to visit with the Jelly Brains. And I'm pretty sure it's spelled BEANS, not BRAINS.
The Jelly Brains opted for the evening special-- Fried Whale Filet in a light wine sauce. Mmmmm! Delicious!
Unfortunately, Kilbane n' Patton managed to outscore two other teams. However, they are slowly working their way back down to dead-last-place! Good luck gals!
I've never seen someone so excited about two free bonus points. Unless you count that one guy at Dave n Busters last week. He was scary as hell.
The pub quiz started at 7? What crazy-ass senior citizens voted that crap into office?
Team Eleven ordered one basket of fries, a pitcher of Coke, and 47 shots of Jameson. AMEN SISTER!
Unfortunately, NO! Jelly Brains team member took over 5 hours to figure out how to use their mobile devices. Hence, no cheating occured. Thankfully.
Someone got a BIIIIIIG promotion. So it looks like the brain surgery takes a front seat to the pub quiz. Thanks for having screwed-up priorities! Argh.
Neither one of these is a Kilbane or a Patton. But the homeless shelter was closed, so who am I to play God?

October 2011

Kilbane n' Patton managed to come in 4th from last in this EPIC battle of who knows less!
And continuing along their drinking path of wonderment, Kilbane n' Patton managed to actually drink the bar out of Captain Morgan. Way to go gals!
The fish was delicious. No, not delicious, it was SCRUPTIOUS! Maybe next month, we'll try the fish again!
Unfortunately, this is entirely true. Even Jason Beiber, Justin's older brother, didn't want his picture taken.
Little did this team know, pot pies haven't been on the menu for over 3 years. But they tried their damnedest anyways.
My mom decides she's finally had enough of me completely sucking at the pub quiz, and loses it. And really, who can blame her?
Aunt Mitzilla let loose a bombshell at the quiz, announcing her undying love for ESPN correspondent J.A. Adande. We weren't really that surprised.
Kilbane n' Patton can't find the right thong on the wrong stripper to put their money. That is all.
Local heroes decided to band together and invent their new gang signs for the quiz. This one is an MD. It either stands for mike d, or Melon Disasters. Either way, I love it!
A special shout out to those of you that filled our household pumpkins with weasel urine this year. Thanks for that, you jerks.

September 2011

The locals reacted with discontent when faced with the complexity of signing up for the quiz. The poor poor bastards.
Living up to the famous Guns n Roses lyric, Team Eleven historian Ken busts out a rare twenty dollar bill just to show off for the ladies! You playa!
The shirtless wonder ponders this question as Beardy Man angrily digs in his holster for his nine.
Unfortunately, the Flying Monkeys managed to forget to press this button, otherwise they may have scored more than 12 points across 47 questions.
Last place champions Kilbane and Patton decided to lay low this month, and only win last place by 13 points. Thanks gang!
Unbeknownst to me, this undercover FBI agent lied to me online. She wasn't an 87-year-old hotty at ALL!
This gentleman was passed a note explaining the intricacies of how his car was accidentally stuffed into a garbage truck in the parking lot. I think he's taking it rather well.
Hey, Bacon! You are wrong. The correct answer was The Molasses Badger.

August 2011

This photo was taken in my walk-in closet. Now you tell me.
These hardened street thugs took a break from their life in the hood to test their meddle at the quiz!
Finally, the mightly Kilbane and Patton have reclaimed their throne in absolute last place. Way to go gals!
Here my beautiful bride figures out how to slash the tires on my car without me finding out. Too late.
Eric decides to create rude caricatures instead of writing in actual answers.
My padre hung up his hat as the archnemesis of Mr. Clean, the rarely seen Padre Scribbler. It never went very well.
Makin Bacon isn't cheating, they're just bored. A little mobile Angry Birds ought to fix that.
Listen, Team Eleven, here's the thing. We are wondering why you havent kicked butt recently to take home first place. What's up with that?

July 2011

Awkward, party of one, your table is ready.
I learned, the hard way, not to ever trust wandering hands.
The Flying Monkies have a heated argument over which wrong answer is the wrongiest!
I hear the Irish can do AMAZING things with fish. And lo and behold, tis true!
Unfortunately, these unsuspecting patrons all got large sweaty hugs from Doug, moments later.
And this was the last anyone saw of him.
Only Kilbane and Patton couldn't seem to figure out how that futuristic device worked. So no worries. No cheating.
He's right there. Behind the paper. Staring at you. Acusingly.

June 2011

Despite knowing roughly one percent of the questions, Kilbane and Patton still managed to find time to dance during the quiz.
The deliciousness that was this mighty plate of feed was quickly demolished by rabid wolves.
This freightening specimen was spotted with a full summer-blend beard of riteousness.
Although, the inate ability to poorly operate a cellular device proved too much for her to handle.
Unfortunately, these patrons managed to completely junk up my dental exam photos with their drinking and talking. THANKS FOR THAT!
These are the only few hours during the week where Uncle Pete can actually get a few moments of sleep.
Aunt Ken and Uncle Mitzilla managed to squeek out a minor victory while waiting for the quiz to begin!
Local legend Karter Mongomery spins a yarn for the unsuspecting.
The local Cleveland chapter of the Face Hair Club for Men and Women held their weekly meeting at the quiz. How wonderful for us!
And then, when I threw the fish at him, he was all like, running away and screaming!
Fresh off their victory from last month, this dapper-looking crew plumeted to 97th place.
was a small barbie doll filled with hot oil and mayonaise. No one ever found them.
Except for this guy. He found the Barbie dolls and stuffed 83-percent of them in his pants. You're welcome.

May 2011

Baby boy Douggy managed to bring home some serious bacon from being our last place WINNER!
This magical team managed to come in 8th place! How exciting mom!
ON SALE TODAY!
Special shout-out to the rare beared leper colony of North West Wisconsin!
Look at these wacky gals! So sassy! And capable of all wrong answers! Although they did scrape their way to 3rd place! WAY TO BE!
These two do.
Finally, My Grandma Can't Wrestle took home some kick-ass prizes!
As mi padre entered in the knick-of-time to join the hat ladies!
Oh how the mighty have fallen. From 1st-place last month, to 6th place this month. You guys n gals will get em next month!
I mean, REALLY awkward.
Team number niner bailed early. And little did they know, they came in 7th place!
Although none of them managed to win any swag this month. You'll win something next month! I KNOW IT!
The perfect gift for a Leper Colony puppy! Don't tell him about the bacon in the fridge that you gave to the cat!

April 2011

ZZ Top's rhythm guitarist decided to show up, and show off his new fedora.
Univeristy of Southern Parma? I believe you meant to say Harvard!
This envelope contained all of the correct answers to this month's quiz. If only the Flying Monkeys had hung on to it a bit longer.
My mom decided to land that bombshell on me right in the middle of the quiz. Thanks MOM!
Moments after this photo was taken, the cast of Dancing with the Stars Season 2 plummeted through the ceiling destroying everything in their wake.
And by "wild", I mean "awkward". The crowd begrudgingly feigned interest in the quiz while most took small naps between beers.
The beautiful damsels wowed the crowd with their witty repetoir and wonderful incorrect answers. Except for that one round where they got 14 points. That was weird.

March 2011

Who's that handsome quiz master up on the stage? Yeah, I don't see one either.
Yeah, thanks for making fun of Charlie Sheen AGAIN. You guys are heartless.
And then, on Wednesday, he unleashed his mighty beard.
The leper colony helped out with photos. And by helped out, I mean, scared me.
Moments after this photo was taken, the whole bar went dark. It was awesome!
ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!! WHO!?
Spill! There's a SPILL! HURRY! SPILL!! SAVE YOURSELF!
How do you know if you had a GREAT night at the pubquiz? If you leave with NEW UNDIES!
I knew it! He was behind the failing of the Parma School System!
No, the University of Southern Parma is quite prestigous!
Action CAKE!
We'll miss her-him!
Your table is ready.
The gang from the Burke School of Irish dance wowed us with they wrong answers! You go GIRLS!
Yeah, but think of it this way, I was wearing a brand NEW shirt!
Fail.
It's a picture of a camera! OMG LOLOLOLOL!!!!!
My parents were working on an all-nighter with gallons of Robotussin. It didn't work out very well!
The staff at the mighty PJ's is ready to dish out some sweet sweet vittles! And beers! GO TEAM!

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